The Adventures of Me & My Shadow #10 in CA & NV 3/5/98
Hi every one! I had a nice visit with Elton, Jinny and the boys
Allen & Ryan. Allen put me to work helping him on a project
he was working on for the architect class he is taking. It was
to design and build a chair. Now that sounds simple enough but
the teacher added some rules and Allen must have had a nightmare
to come up with his design, it was like no other design I have
ever seen. To make it worse, the teacher said not to use any upholstery
on it. It was made of aluminum and wood, we got enough of it done
for me to check it for comfort and I was really supprised. It
was pretty good but some upholstery would have helped, my bony
old butt needs a little upholstery. I wish him luck and hope I
can see it when it is finished.
Since starting my travels in the motorhome I have learned some
valuable lessons. First, I learned that the best oranges in the
world come from a neighbors yard in Sarasota, FL . Second, I learned
that spending a lot of money on fancy lamp poles don't get you
smooth streets. Third, I learned that being a county commissioner
in Texas don't get you a decent road past your house. I also found
that there is enough hot air in Texas to get a museum airborne,
I didn't see it but I did see a sign pointing to where it was.
Forth, I learned that I should not ask an Aerospace engineer to
tell me how to get from Fountain Valley, CA to Lakewood, CA. This
engineer is a brother of the commissioner in Texas so I should
have known. I had asked Gertrude & Gus to find the best way
to get to Lakewood from Fountain Valley and they both said to
take I 405 to CA19 going north. I was telling this engineer this
and he said "no I should exit to I 605 to go north".
He said he used to go this way every day on his way to work. Well
I thought that I must have misunderstood Gertrude & Gus, this
engineer must know what he is talking about, he lives here. When
I headed up I 405 and got in the correct lane to exit to I 605
and was waiting for Gertrude to tell me to exit and she didn't
say a word. Next thing I know I'm headed north on I 605 and Gertrude
is mad at me so I pulled off and turned her off and asked Gus
what to do and he said "get back on I 405 where I was supposed
to be", I zoomed out on the map and there it was, plain as
day, the best way to go to where I wanted to go was on I 405.
I got back on I 405 and made it up to Bob & Terry's OK but
they were not home yet. I went to Michelle's and she wasn't home
either I went back to Bob's and found them home this time. It
was here the next day that I learned valuable lesson #5, Don't
let an accountant fix an electric lawn mower. Now I'm sure that
Bob is a good accountant. He is in the army reserves and he is
already a Major so he must be a good army officer. He must be
a good lover as they got married last August and they are expecting
this August. He is studying law but that won't teach him how to
fix a lawn mower and a good lawn mower fixer he is not. He told
me that he has to keep fixing his lawn mower but he had to go
to a reserve meeting the next day, I told him I would check it
out. Well after looking at it I figured that if he had fixed it
one more time it would be beyond salvage. I found out that it
must be about as old as he was and they no longer listed parts
for it. So I got my tools out and went to work on it, happy to
know that I was needed. He mowed the lawn with it the next day
and it stood the test. I told him that if it stops again not to
try to fix it but to call me.
Every one had to be back to work Monday so after a nice visit
over the weekend I headed north to West Covina in the rain in
rush (should be called slow) hour traffic as the storm was forecast
to get worse and it did, but only after I got up to Bessie's.
Bessie told me she wanted to take me to see the movie "Titanic".
I had not seen it so we went. It was a great movie and I thank
her for taking me, however the next day I found out why she took
me. She had a list of things for me to do. Bessie you don't have
to take me to a movie to get me to work, just give me the list,
it's my pleasure. She had a bag of oranges from her daughters
back yard ready for me when I arrived and it was just in time,
I was down to half a grapefruit from the bag that I had gotten
from Ron & Connie. I also picked a bag of kumquats from a
tree in her backyard, they are a small orange like fruit that
tastes like it might be crossed with a lemon. It's on the bitter
side, you eat the skin and everything but the seeds. If the price
is right I can stand the bitterness and I sure can't beat the
price. When I got to Doug & Di's they tried the kumquats and
liked them so I traded some for some lemons from their tree and
learned lesson #6. A lemon tree has thorns, I sure didn't know
that. Doug has been working 10 hour days 7 days a week for the
phone co. I suppose it was because of El Nino, he was getting
tired but also getting rich. Had a nice visit over the weekend
and headed to Las Vegas.
The trip to Las Vegas went well, I could see snow on the mountains
to the east of Riverside at the higher elevations. The road stayed
at the lower elevations so it was no problem, I can see snow at
the higher elevations north and west of Las Vegas. I was feeling
some vibration in the front of the motorhome on the way up here
and on inspection it looks like I had better get a new set of
tires on the front wheels before I go much further. This RV park
is the nicest park I have ever been in, level concrete sites,
clean toilets, paved roads, phone hookups, beautiful landscaping
and the price $12.50 per night is lower than any other. The only
problem is the air traffic. most of the traffic taking off from
the airport is overhead much of the time. I can't complain about
the price of gas. Less than a buck most places, Had to go to the
Naval Base in San Diego for $115.9 the lowest price there. All
places in LA area it could be found for less than a buck but price
range in each area was about 20 cents. Lowest price here looks
like $108.9 but haven't been around much.
Now in talking to the Space Shuttle engineer down in Fountain
Valley, he told me that he had engineered the toilet on the Space
Shuttle. I got to thinking about toilets and the lack of gravity
and realized that this could be quite an engineering challenge.
It could be complicated even more when the astronaughts showed
up without external plumbing. I never found out just how he solved
all the problems but it started me reminiscing about how the toilet
has evolved in my lifetime. I'm sure that some of the younger
generation might find this subject interesting and unbelievable
but you older ones will say "been there and done that"
you have to agree that up to now not much has been written on
the subject. I will now take you from the 1930s up to the space
shuttle, where you will have to talk to this engineer to get all
the details on it.
First there was the out house, the two hole unit, there were a
few one hole and a few three hole units but most of them were
two hole. That means that you could have company while you went
to the toilet. Along with the outhouse there was the Sears Roebuck
catalog, it was brought on because of the depression and hard
times, if you were having trouble putting food on the table, toilet
paper was a luxury few could afford. A page or two from the catalog
could get the job done but when there was nothing left but the
slick pages it could take up to five or six pages to get the same
results. There was also the corn cob, now this was the perfect
tool for the job, one pass was all it took, however the cobs would
fill the hole up faster and the toilet would have to be moved
more often. Now you know where the expression "ruff as a
cob" comes from.
The 1940s came, I got to do some traveling and I discovered different
styles of toilets. Of course there was the flush toilet similar
to what we see today, some of the early flush toilets in public
rest rooms had the tank mounted high on the wall with a chain
coming down to pull to flush the toilet. I discovered the toilet
on the train where I could look down through it and see the railroad
ties going by, this one didn't need to be flushed. The military
aircraft had the waxed paper bag that was put down into ( for
lack of a better word) a potty chair and when finished was thrown
overboard.. The fighter planes had the relief tube (a funnel on
a hose) under the seat, it worked good for those of us with external
plumbing. If you felt a few rain drops after a plane went over
you could have been mistaken. I have not yet learned what they
use for some of the fighter pilots today who don't have the necessary
fixture to use the relief tube. The navy ships had the stainless
steel trough next to the hull or outside wall with a constant
stream of salt water running through it and discharging out the
side of the ship. It was best to stay out from under this discharge
with the small boats. This trough had one by six inch slats across
it and could seat ten or more sailors. I recall one time I was
sitting there doing my duty and a sailor up stream wodded up some
toilet paper, set it afire and dropped it on the fast moving water,
it singed everyone down stream but no real damage was done. A
trip to the south pacific and on the islands I discovered the
latrine. This was a throwback from the outhouse. An inclosure
with a shallow ditch around the interior of the wall and a two
by four to hang your rear end over. There was a splash guard going
down from the two by four that prevented you from filling the
back pockets on your lowered pants. There was no roof over this
structure so you didn't waste any time there when it was raining.
Then there was the over water toilets at the Halavo Seaplane base.
A catwalk about twenty feet long to a row of seats. They were
about like the ones in the two hole outhouse but here there were
ten to fourteen holes, no walls or roof, just a hand railing to
keep us from falling in the water. This system worked pretty good
most of the time when there was an offshore breeze. It was a different
story when there was an onshore breeze. Then the solids came into
the beach ( because salt water is heavier than fresh water all
of the solids floated). This is where I learned to swim and I
was on the beaching crew for a time (putting the wheels on the
flying boats so they could be pulled up on the beach) so you can
get an idea of the problem.
In 1952 I was in Naples Italy and I discovered the Bidet. It was
another fixture in most rest rooms, it looked like it could be
a urinal, it was about as tall as a commode but was longer and
had no seat. On close inspection I found a handle that turned
a fountain on that squirted cold water up in the air. I suppose
it was to save paper, after you finished on the commode you could
squat down over this thing and wash the only part of your anatomy
that needed washing, but with cold water? I haven't been back
again to see if they still have them. I would have tried it if
they had warm water and a towel to dry my self with. In 1955 I
got to Japan and found a very unusual toilet, I won't call it
a rest room as it was no place to rest. All there was there was
a concrete floor with water running across it. There were stepping
stones and two places to put your feet while you squatted down
and dropped your load down a hole in the floor. For a long time
Japan used human waste as fertilizer, I don't think they do today.
In 1976 my motorhome was built with a recirculating toilet. Some
water is put in it, a deodorant is added and the water is recirculated
to flush it till it is full. A valve is opened to dump it into
the holding tank and the cycle is repeated. It works OK but I
don't see any new RVs with this style toilet today.
Today we have the toilets that know when you are done and flush
automatically. The engineer above has in his toilet a vent fan
that comes on when you walk in the door even if you are just going
to brush your teeth. His brother, the Texas commissioner has his
vent fan switch so you can reach it from the throne, just in case
you forgot to turn it on before you sat down. It looks to me like
someone would come up with a gas sensor under the rim of the commode
that would turn on the fan and flush the toilet at the first whiff
of a fowl odor. I guess I'll have to start working on it. One
more thing, there was always a paper shortage at all of the above,
so if you didn't bring your own you had to improvise, this can
be quite a challenge.
Now I hope that the engineer will fill in the last paragraph and
let us know how the toilet on the space shuttle works.
Till next time, Dallas, or Dad if it Fits.